Okay, Hi.
Things have been going on.
So yeah... Err. Well, report cards are coming soon. Very soon. I feel screwed though. But I brought up all my grades in the classes I got Bs in, only to get Bs in the classes I had As in. Like Chemistry which I do not understand how since I do all the homework and get decent grades in everything. And like Pre-Calculus (which I was already getting a B in) but now I'm at a really really low B. Borderline C. And that's depressing.
There's been a lot of things on my mind so why don't I start with school.
So there's this boy at school that I think is really hot. I think I've only seen him four times the whole time I've been at that school. I've only had a good glance at his face twice. But he's so cute. His name is Anthony (I think). I first saw him when I was walking the hallways, not wanting to go to first period yet. He looked really cool with his shoulder-length brown hair and his red skinny jeans. He looked different from everyone I had been seeing at school. I didn't see him again for a LONG time. And he never crossed my mind again.
Then, my friends were talking about this dude only I didn't know they were. They said he wore skin-tight colored skinny jeans and that he was probably bisexual and he always smelled like drugs and all this weird stuff. The way they described him, I thought he was probably funny-looking, Asian maybe (which is not a bad thing) and high-looking. I was thinking that he was gonna look like this dude I had seen at my old school.
Then one day, they got into a deep conversation about the dude and I was like, "Woah, I have to see him." And they showed me him and I was blown away. He was so hot. And I was looking at my friends like, "What ?! He's cute!"
And I couldn't stop thinking about him. Oh my gosh. I'm very superficial. But not like in the I'M IN LOVE WAY. But more like, I want to see his face again. I never saw him again until one day (last week), me and my very good friend were walking to my Pre-Calculus class and I saw him pass by with another guy. It made me remember that I had seen him for the first time in that hallway. My friend was ranting about something but I couldn't help but stare at him. He guy-hugged his friend and started walking away. I thought it was a little weird because I never see guys walk each other to class unless their class is in the same direction.
But the dude walked his friend to class and then walked out of the hallway. I told my friends this and one of them kept implying that it was a gay thing to do. I didn't really know what to think.
Well, I did get some info about him. Like, he's actually around my age. I thought he was a Junior but he's actually a sophomore. At least he's supposed to be. My friend thinks he stayed back. I'm not so sure about that because I saw him coming out of the same hallway where I have my Chemistry class and I don't think there's any freshmen classes there but I could be wrong. Another thing is that he comes from a very normal family meaning, his parents aren't druggies or actual bad parents.
My friend was telling me how she was asking him why he wasn't answering her texts and he said it was because his mother turned off his phone since he was skipping school a lot (something like that). And then the boy was like, "But I can always use my mommy's phone." Mommy. Mommy. Mommy's phone. My friend told me he wasn't even playing around with it. Truthfully, I thought it was cute. But my friend doesn't think so. And she says that he says a lot of off thinks like that.
Also, this same friend is trying to hook up with Jonathan. So I guess I'm playing matchmaker. I don't know how it's gonna work out though since things have been kinda awkward. I don't really see him much except at lunch time. And we don't sit at the same tables. If things were like before, it would've been simple. But it's not.
I asked Jonathan if he could buy me something from Hot Topic and we were gonna use that as a decoy. She was going to bring $20 and I was gonna be like that, "Oh, could you buy two studded bracelets, one for me and one for my friend over there. Her name's -------." And then I would casually walk away and then they would flirt together and yeah....
Things never work out the way they do in my head. He was going to Hot Topic this weekend but my friend forgot to bring the money. And that was a blow. I can't believe she likes him though. I don't know. Even though me and Jonathon used to hug and be all friend-y friend-y and close. I never liked him like that. One being that he was Jackie's boyfriend and ex-boyfriend. And, I don't know... I just didn't like him like that.
I told my friend that he had cutting issues too. My friend cuts. So they were totally compatible. And I told her that his last girlfriend had issues. And that I didn't know if they were still going out. I told her everything from the Yu-Gi-Oh cards to the suicide attempts and yeah... I'm such a bad friend. :(
I had my first interesting conversation about music on Friday. I was happy because I've always wanted to meet someone with the same musical interests I did and FINALLY it happened. So I was laying my head down in Chemistry class and I heard someone talk about Brendon Urie. And my head shot up. HELLO Panic! At The Disco! And then I was like, "Did she just say Brendon Urie?"
The girls that were talking about it were like, "Yeah, she thinks she gonna marry him." Something like that. And me, wanting to get into the conversation was like, "Um no, I'm going to marry him."
And it all started from there. The girl and I started talking about MCR, Hollywood Undead, and just rock, alternative music like that. She recommended me Blood On The Dancefloor. And talked about Avenged Sevenfold. And she showed me their pictures as we were walking to the next class. I was in bliss.
But now I don't wanna go back to school. I just want to be antisocial and stay in a rock with my laptop. You know what I mean? This is why I can't make friends.
Anything else?
Err. Well, I want to do that Google project thing. More about it later, I guess.
I feel like I was gonna say something else.
Oh yeah. I suck. I really suck. I seriously binged today and yesterday. And this isn't just some, ate three pizzas binge. I mean, eating almost half a bag of chips with salsa. After eating four bowls of cereal. My stomach hurt so bad and I wanted to throw up. Then I binged again at dinner. I'm a reck. I don't know how I'm gonna do it. I went to the doctor's on Friday and I'm 126 pounds. Which is two pounds down from 128 but I don't understand how. I'm guessing it was because I only had a banana and Special K bar for lunch and I had only eaten another Special K bar before going to the doctor's.
There's a girl in my class who weighs 125. I know this because we were doing professional presentations in Engineering class and we were presenting the cardboard chairs we made. And she mentioned she was 125. I didn't understand how this girl was only 3 pounds lighter than me but still looked way better than I did. At least I thought so. I don't know how my body looks anymore. I know I'm not in great shape so I know I need to lose weight. But ugh.
Sometimes I wonder if I should even be restricting my calories. I want to grow. My dad was saying something about it. I'll talk about it later I guess. I don't know. Let me go. My sister had PLL on the laptop and I need to catch up.
SO BYEE!
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